Apoptygma Berzerk

{I wish I was that brave!!}

I had forgotten how much I missed standing in the front row, inches away from the lead singer and feet away from the rest of the band. I had forgotten how much I love rocking out and singing as loudly as I can with the band and the rest of the audience. I forgot how awesome a really good concert is and how it invigorates me. Unfortunately for the rest of my family, I've been listening to the music non stop because I don't want to let that feeling go.

Joel and I (along with his brother and his wife) went to an Apoptygma Berzerk concert on Tuesday night, er...actually Wednesday morning. We started by meeting the band at Hot Topic Tuesday evening, then we went to The Yardhouse, then we shopped around a little bit at the mall, and then off to The Sugarbowl. After that we headed to the concert. It was an insanely small location. The first band was supposed to go on at 9, but finally went on at 9:45...then we had to stand through 3 opening bands (I got up front on the last opening band to make sure I was up front for Apop. It was SOOO worth it!). They finally went on at 12:45 (I was soooo tired at this point, feeling every bit my age, but as soon as they came on I woke right up with energy to spare). The stage was only a foot off the ground and the lead singer was seriously right above me, inches away (if I didn't respect personal space, I totally could've been all up in his business). Everybody was dancing and singing, it was such a rush! It had been 4 years since my last concert...I hope it's not another 4.

Have you ever had an incredibly embarrassing song stuck in your head that you happen to sing just a little bit of to your daughter while your buckling her into her carseat? And then when you're at Target she belts it out as loud as she possibly can?

Yeah...me neither.

St. Patrick's Day

What do I think about when I think of Ireland? I think of all the rich history. Their determination to not only rise when they fell, but to fight back and overcome. Unfortunately, this view of Ireland has been tainted somewhat by its current inhabitants (nobody I know personally). I've recently heard some of them mock how Americans claim to be Irish because their "dad's great uncle's dog was from Ireland". It's not necessarily Ireland we're proud of, but the spirit it represents. Being American, we definitely possess the essence of rebel freedom. Fighting to rise above, not only defeating but becoming better. I am a proud Daughter of the Revolution, and my family and I will always celebrate the 4th of July with pride, but I don't think there's anything wrong with celebrating our deeper roots as well.
THAT SAID, here's what we did!

I made homemade soda bread, Steak and Guinness pie, green mashed potatoes, glazed carrots, and brownies frosted to look like the Irish flag. We went over to our friend's house to eat and hang out. All in all, it was a pretty good day!

{Oops! I took the picture upside down...sorry it looks funny}

I Shouldn't Admit This

Ya know...I used to be able to contribute to a conversation. I used to be able to tell a good story, or maybe even a joke or two. Now, I wouldn't go so far as to say that I was "funny", but people would at least indulge me by laughing at my attempts anyway.
Bragging? No. You see, this is something that most people can do. However, I've now found that years of stippled conversation has taken its toll on me and now I'm left with saying such things as "yadda, yadda" and stumbling over my words, trying to get a complete sentence out.

Here is a teensy example of my daily conversations (which usually take place while I am on the phone):
"I was talking to Joel about {Mikayal, you stop that right now} maybe going to {I said STOP stepping on your brother's head!} Ireland! Wouldn't that be {Do I need to send you to time out!!} so much fun?!"

Now imagine that same conversation when I am kid free:
"I was talking to Joel about....umm....uh, maybe going to Ireland. I found a great deal on tickets, my mom could watch the kids, yadda, yadda, yadda...wouldn't that be so much fun?"

Then, to top it all of, not only can I not speak like a normal, sane adult...but I've also been saying the strangest things at the most awkward times:
Friend- "I recently went to a funeral where the preacher said some really harsh things to the grieving family in front of the whole congregation (I'm omitting the actual event...just in case)"
Me...feeling awkward and wanting to change the subject- "When I was a teenager I wanted to have a pink casket and be buried in my studded belt and skate shoes." (who.says.that?!?!)
All eyes turn to me.
Friend -"Um, so this place is really fun! We should definitely come here more often."
(and by "we" I'm pretty sure she meant everyone but the psycho who thinks about the details of her funeral).

What is the moral of this embarrassing story? I desperately need to have more adult conversation. I think it's a mix of being nervous around adults who aren't challenged in this department, not being around other adults very often (or at least without kids), and not being able to have an uninterrupted conversation.ever.

Joel~see...I need to have more girl's night out. It's imperative to my mental health. seriously.

Let the Countdown Begin

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